Last weekend I was in my son’s football game when another mother came to me and said:
“Hey, if you ever need help to get W to a game, we are happy to help. We have room in our car, so ask.”
She has younger children and admitted that “One day we will also juggle three football schedules, and I hope someone offers the same support.”
That moment almost brought me to tears. Not only because she offered help, but because it reminded me of which friendships were really built: give And received.
And yet … If you are a working mother in the fat of raising children and building a career, friendship is one of the things that slides to the rear burner. Between work, children and the current task list, the feeling of hanging around or even just making contact with friends, feels like a “later” goal.
But the truth is: friendships are important. They give us support, laughter, perspective and the memory that we do not do life alone. So how do we cherish them – even in busy seasons?
In this message I share five simple, feasible ways to strengthen your friendships, inspired by Anna Goldfarb’s book Modern friendship And the conversations I have had with many of my coaching customers.
1. Set your friendship goals
As working mothers we always set goals – for our career, health and families. But do you ever have one friendship goal?
Think about what you want in this season of life. Do you want:
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To deepen the friendships you already have?
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More local friends you can see regularly?
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A group of friends with whom you can travel or try new things?
Without a clear goal it is easy to feel that something is missing, but not being able to mention what it is. Once you know what you are looking for, you can take small steps to make it.
2. Involved to appear
Active friendships are intention and some consistency.
It does not mean that you have to plan extensive trips, but it is important to “appear” in one way or another for the things that matter. Sometimes it is as simple as remembering birthdays, sending a “good luck” text for a large work event, or celebrating milestones with a quick coffee or a card.
Small gestures are more important than we think. So decide how you want to show up for the friendships in your life (or those you deepen) and then place those obligations in the calendar.
3. Automate the connection
Our brains are already juggling a million things. Don’t be afraid to use memories to make the connection easier:
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Put birthdays and milestones in your agenda.
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Set recurring memories to check in.
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Plan a monthly coffee or telephone date.
It is not a shame to need a system. Automation of the connection ensures that your busy life does not stand in the way And It releases energy and still keeps friendships alive.
4. Double Dip
We all say that there is “no time” for friends. But what if your friendship devotes to the things you already do?
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Invite a friend to participate in your training or walk.
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Do groceries together (yes, even returns can be more fun with the company!).
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My favorite example: a group of women who plan their annual mammograms on the same day and then have lunch.
Ordinary tasks become connecting points when you share them.
5. Ask for (and accept) help
This can feel uncomfortable – but it is often the most powerful.
Friendship is not just about showing up for others; It is also about having others appear for you:
These moments build trust and deepen relationships. And of course offer help when you can – without keeping the score.
Friendship takes the intention – but it is worth it
As a working mother your plate is full. But investing even a little energy in friendships can bear fruit in great ways. Because the truth is: none of us is meant to do this alone.
If friendship has been on your back burner for you, I would like to help you make a plan to have the number and types of friendships you want. We will start with the triads of overwhelming daily life and the chaos is a little more organized, so that you have the space to add something else – such as concentrating on your friendships. From there we set your goals, identify the action steps that you can take and make a plan so that you know exactly what to do and when. You know exactly what to do to create the desired friendships, and you will have the responsibility to continue.
Click below for more information about 1: 1 coaching and enter a short application to see if you would be a fit.